Balancing leading and team autonomy is a complex challenge that requires a keen understanding of personal preferences, the team’s working style, and the demands of the task. While being overly controlling—“riding your people”—can come off as overbearing, a lack of oversight can lead to chaos. Self-determination theory emphasizes that people thrive when they experience autonomy, competence, and relatedness, something that perfectionist, fear-driven perfectionist leadership styles often undermine. Yet holding high standards is important for accountability.

A striking example is Chef Charlie Trotter, whose intense perfectionism made him a culinary icon but came at the cost of strained relationships, health, and, ultimately, his life. In high-stakes environments, such as top-tier restaurants or event planning, attention to detail is paramount. Leaders may feel compelled to maintain strict control to ensure quality, but constant micromanagement can erode team morale and trust.

The key to effective leadership lies in fostering psychological safety, as highlighted by Amy Edmondson of Harvard Business School. When team members feel comfortable discussing mistakes without fear of retribution, fewer errors occur, and higher standards are naturally upheld. Leaders must create an environment where everyone understands the non-negotiables and has the freedom to flex in other areas. By cultivating a team that genuinely cares about quality, leaders can avoid policing and instead focus on their broader responsibilities, ensuring that accountability is shared respectfully across the team.

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